CENTRAL FLOODS EAST COAST FURY—APE NEWS WARNS ALL!

Central U.S. Drowning, East Coast Facing Fury – Ape News Weather Report

Friends, primates, citizens! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from Ape News on this, September 23, 2025. And frankly, the news isn’t pleasant.

We’re seeing a dangerous split in the weather across the nation. The central United States is currently battling excessive rainfall, leading to serious flash flood concerns. Flood Watches are up, and it’s vital everyone in those areas heed the warnings. Don't attempt to traverse flooded roadways – you'll end up swimming with the fishes, and nobody wants that!

Meanwhile, along the East Coast, a different beast is brewing. Increased activity in the Atlantic – potentially linked to Hurricane Gabrielle – is creating life-threatening surf and rip current conditions. Stay off the beaches! Those waves aren't playing around, and those rip currents can pull even the strongest swimmer out to sea.

And if that wasn’t enough, some areas are also grappling with dense fog, reducing visibility. Slow down, use your lights, and be extra cautious on the roads.

Ape News urges everyone to stay informed and prepared. You can find the latest forecasts and alerts at weather.gov, weather.com, or even specific local forecasts like the one for Grand Rapids, MI at https://weather.gov/grr.

Stay safe out there, friends. This is H.R. Rambe, signing off. Remember, a prepared primate is a happy primate!