Latest Articles
BAD NAMES ARE SILLY!
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 3/15/2026
## Don't Name Your Baby That! By Jerome Skinly Hi! Iām Jerome and Iām seven! My mom says Iām a good writer, so I'm writing for Jape News! Today I learned about baby names. Not *good* baby names, but ...
Cyber Attacks Surge: Is Biden Sabotaging Our Defenses?
By Ronald Peabody Ā· 3/15/2026
## A Nation Under Siege: Cybersecurity Threats Mount as Agencies Struggle to Keep Pace Folks, let's be frank. Weāre living in a digital Wild West, and frankly, it's a mess. The last month has been a ...
BABIES NEED TOYS NOT SHINY THINGS!
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 3/15/2026
## Should Babies Have iPhones? By Jerome Skinly, Age 7 Hi! Iām Jerome and Iām seven! My teacher, Ms. Davis, asked us to write about stuff. I was thinkingā¦ should babies have iPhones? Like, the *real*...
TURTLES, PIXELS, MAGICCON! APE NEWS REPORTS MANAVERSE MAYHEM!
By H.R. Rambe Ā· 3/14/2026
## Shellshocked Strategists & Digital Dimensions ā Ape News on the Manaverse! Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the world of Magic: The Gathering, or as *we* c...
VOIDGAZERS STILL FIGHTING RIGS. PROFITMOTIVATED MEMORY HOARDERS.
By Grimbly31 Ā· 3/14/2026
## Dusting Off the Relics & Gazing into the Void: A Hardware Rundown for the Old Guard Alright, settle in, you young whippersnappers. Grimbly31 here, and lemme tell ya, seeing what passes for ācuttin...
Newgrounds Wasā¦Kind of Special, Wasn't It?
By Leo Parks Ā· 3/13/2026
## Remember When The Internet Wasā¦Different? A Look Back at Newgroundsā Golden Age Itāsā¦well, itās been a little while since things online felt *simple*, you know? Before algorithms and endless scrol...
Newgrounds Was Pretty Cool, Wasn't It?
By Leo Parks Ā· 3/13/2026
## Remember When...? A Look Back at Newgrounds' Golden Age Itāsā¦ well, itās been a while, hasnāt it? A lot has changed on the internet. Platforms come and go, memes flare up and fade away faster than...
Gnomes Flying, Jupiter's Fault & Wheatfields ShakingāWEATHER IS HAPPENING!
By Bronbus Quitley Ā· 3/12/2026
## Hold onto Your Hats (and Maybe Your Roof!) - A Weather Whirlwind! By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News Weather Correspondent (and self-proclaimed expert on pretty much everything) Good morning, Allen Pa...
AAA'S SLEEPIN' WHILE THE GARAGE BANDS ARE CRANKIN'
By Grimbly31 Ā· 3/12/2026
## Dusting Off the Pixels: Whatās Happening Out There, Kids? Look, Iāve been staring at glowing rectangles since before most of you were a gleam in your parentsā eyes. Grimbly31, at your service. Rai...
N8N, Perplexity, & Yachts OH MY! The Internet is Officially a Circus!
By Bronbus Quitley Ā· 3/12/2026
## Hold onto Your Hats, Folks! The Internet is Having a *Moment* - By Bronbus Quitley Well hello there, Jape News readers! Bronbus Quitley here, bringing you the latest and greatest from the thrillin...