April Apocalypse: Is God Angry at Grand Rapids?

A Soggy Start to April – Are We Being Punished for Our Sins?

Grand Rapids is getting soaked, folks. And frankly, I’m starting to wonder if this isn’t a sign of something bigger. A message, if you will. Now, I’m not one for biblical interpretations usually – I leave that to the…enthusiasts – but a good, solid downpour like this feels less like “weather” and more like a cleansing. A reckoning.

This morning started grey, naturally. But it wasn't the pleasant, calming grey of a peaceful morning. It was a threatening grey. And now, as I look out my window here at Jape News headquarters, it’s come to pass. Rain, and not just a little drizzle, but a full-blown deluge. They're even talking about thunderstorms this afternoon. Thunderstorms in April! Back in my day, April showers meant a brief sprinkle, not a potential biblical flood.

The so-called “experts” over at the National Weather Service are calling it an “active spring-like pattern.” Active? That’s one way to put it. I call it excessive. And frankly, it’s unsettling. We’ve been getting these extreme weather events more and more frequently. Remember that mild winter we had? Unnatural, I tell you!

They say there’s a 93% chance of rain today. Ninety-three percent! That's practically guaranteed. And the winds are picking up too, east-southeast at 10 to 20 miles per hour. It’s a mess.

Looking ahead, it doesn’t get much better. They’re forecasting heavy rain continuing into Saturday, followed by a significant drop in temperature. Saturday night we're looking at a low of only 36 degrees! Thirty-six! In April! It's enough to give a man the chills, and not just from the dampness.

Now, I’m not saying this is directly related to…well, everything that’s been going on, but it’s hard not to see a connection. A return to traditional values, respect for the natural order, a little humility…maybe that's what we need to bring the sunshine back.

For now, stay dry out there, folks. And maybe say a little prayer. It couldn’t hurt.