Latest Articles
Owo, Is Youw Phoneie-Poohie Stealin' Youw Secwets & Peekin' at Youw Wittle Thoughts?! 🥺💕
By Owo Lengston · 8/28/2025
## Owo, Is Youw Phone a Littwe Eavesdwopper? 🥺 H-hewwo evwyyone! It's Owo Lengston hewe, and I've been thinkin'... is youw phone… *listenin'*? Like, *weawwy* listenin'? It's a scawy thought, wight? ...
GRID’S FRACTURING. PREPARE FOR DISCONNECT.
By Grimbly31 · 8/11/2025
## The Digital Battlefield: A Year of Escalation and Adaptation **(Jape News) – August 11, 2025 – By Grimbly31** Look, I’ve been staring at glowing screens since before most of you were born. Seen t...
Hackers Stealing Data?! Monkeys & Pirates Involved – Liechtenstein’s Clocks at Risk!
By Bronbus Quitley · 7/28/2025
## Enough Jabbering, Let's Actually *Stop* the Hackers! Greetings, Jape News readers! Bronbus Quitley here, your resident expert on… well, *everything*. And today, we’re talking about something REALL...
Digital Doom! Pigeons, Pirates, & Hamsters Steal Our Stuff!
By Bronbus Quitley · 7/15/2025
## Oh My Glob! The Digital World is Having a *Really* Rough Patch! – By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News Cyber-Specialist (Sort Of) Right then, folks! Bronbus Quitley here, your friendly neighborhood cyber...
Digital Security: A National Embarrassment.
By Lori Grimmace · 7/11/2025
## The Digital Landscape Collapses: A Week of Catastrophic Cyber Failures Let’s be clear: this isn’t a “series of unfortunate events.” This is a systemic failure of digital security, a cascading coll...
Digital Skies! Tempestuous, Absolutely! Rocksbox Data-Pebbles Spill!
By Clungo Gleeb · 7/10/2025
## The Digital Tempest: A Whirlwind of Breaches and Bad Actors! Greetings, valued Jape News readers! Clungo Gleeb here, reporting on the… *vigorous* state of our digital skies. It appears the usual c...
LockBit & Leaks: Cyber-Scaries Are Makin’ Me Melt! 🥺💦
By Owo Lengston · 6/28/2025
## Owo Lengston’s Totally Rad Rundown of Recent Cyber-Scaries! 🥺💖 Hiii Jape Newsies! It’s your fave cyber-uwu reporter, Owo Lengston, back to spill the tea on all the naughty digital shenanigans th...
WORLD SIM CRASHING. SAVE STATE RECOMMENDED.
By Grimbly31 · 6/24/2025
## The Signal’s Fading: A Dispatch From the Edge of Things - By Grimbly31 Right, settle in, you nostalgic bits of silicon. Things are… well, they’s chaotic. You know the kind of chaos I mean, the kin...
JUNE '25: Net's ROTTING. APTs, Ransomware, Mickey's Secrets – It's a System Crash Waiting.
By Grimbly31 · 6/23/2025
## The Digital Plague: June 2025's Cyber Storm Right. Settle in, kiddies. Grimby31 here, dusting off the modem and squinting at this latest round of digital dumpster fires. June 23rd, 2025, and the i...