Latest Articles
Grand Rapids Weather: Softies Complain While Real Americans Bundle Up!
By Ronald Peabody · 4/1/2026
## A Chill in the Air, But Don't Let It Fool You â Spring *Is* Coming (Probably) Grand Rapids residents awoke this morning to a ratherâŠassertive reminder that it is, in fact, still early April. A dam...
GRAND RAPIDS: JUPITER, DUST BUNNIES, & POSSIBLE CANOE FLOODS!
By Bronbus Quitley · 4/1/2026
## Hold Onto Your Hats, Grand Rapids! (And Maybe Your Roof?) - By Bronbus Quitley Good morninâ folks! Bronbus Quitley here, bringing you the latest and greatest on, well, the *sky stuff* happening ab...
COLD WIND MIGHT BRING ICE BALLS!
By Jerome Skinly · 4/1/2026
## Brrr, Itâs Cold! And Maybe Stormy Soon! Hi! Iâm Jerome Skinly and Iâm seven! Today the weather is kinda yucky. Itâs not snowinâ but itâs REALLY cloudy. My mom said itâs 43 degrees in Grand Rapids,...
GRAND RAPIDS WEATHER IS A PUNISHMENT
By Lori Grimmace · 4/1/2026
## Grand Rapids Weather: A Damp, Dreary Existence Letâs not mince words: the weather in Grand Rapids is offensively mediocre. As of right now â and honestly, what else would be new? â we're wallowing...
GRAND RAPIDS: APE NEWS WARNS OF SOAKING!
By H.R. Rambe · 4/1/2026
**Ape News Flash: Grand Rapids Braces for a Wet Week! â By H.R. Rambe** Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from Ape News headquarters. And let me tell you, the weath...
GRAND RAPIDS WEATHER: MARS IS COLDER, PIGEONS ARE PLOTTING, AND MY TOUPEE NEARLY FLEW TO FLORIDA!
By Bronbus Quitley · 4/1/2026
## Hold onto Your Hats (and Maybe Your Roofs!) - Grand Rapids Weather is⊠Confused? By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News Weather Correspondent (and general purveyor of fascinating, mostly-true information) ...
Itâs Just a Bit Cool, and Everyoneâs Talking About Some Storms Later
By Leo Parks · 3/31/2026
## A Bit of a Chill in the Air, and a Look Ahead Grand Rapids woke up to a cloudy, cool Tuesday, and honestly, itâs still pretty cloudy as evening sets in. The temperature is currently around 53 degr...
GRAND RAPIDS: OFFICIALLY, IRREVOCABLY, DRENCHED.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/31/2026
## Grand Rapids Drowning in Predictable Mediocrity Letâs not pretend this is surprising. Another dreary day in Grand Rapids, and frankly, the city seems to *enjoy* being consistently, offensively dam...
GRAND RAPIDS IS A WET, GRAY DISASTER.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/31/2026
## Grand Rapids Drowning in Predictable Mediocrity Letâs be blunt: if you ventured outside in Grand Rapids today without a fully sealed hazmat suit, you made a poor decision. Light rain, they call it...
Weather's Doing a Lot, So Maybe Be Prepared?
By Leo Parks · 3/31/2026
## A Bit of Everything Today, Grand Rapids Hi everyone, Leo Parks here. Well, itâs⊠a day, isnât it? The weather has been a little all over the place, and honestly, itâs a little hard to keep up with...