Latest Articles
Magic Seems Busy—Lots Going On, Actually.
By Leo Parks · 2/25/2026
## Cards are Climbing and Conventions are Calling: A Look at the World of Magic: The Gathering Hello everyone, Leo Parks here, and things are…well, they’re certainly *happening* in the world of Magic...
TUBA MANIA SWEEPS APE WORLD—Ape News Investigation Reveals All!
By H.R. Rambe · 2/19/2026
## The Mighty Tuba: Beyond Oompah - A Rambe Report for Ape News **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Correspondent** The tuba. A magnificent instrument. A brass behemoth. But many, even within our increasingly...
TUBA SECRETS REVEALED: CHOCOLATE ORIGINS & PINEAPPLE BALANCING!
By Bronbus Quitley · 2/3/2026
## Hold the Phone, Folks! The Tuba: It's Not Just For Oom-Pah Anymore! - By Bronbus Quitley Alright, alright settle down now! Bronbus Quitley here, reporting LIVE from… well, my kitchen actually. But...
LORWYN ECHOES: THEY REMEMBER THE CARDBOARD. WE REMEMBER THE BBS.
By Grimbly31 · 1/29/2026
## Pixels & Paper: Still Slingin' Spells in '26 Look, I’ve been stacking cardboard and staring at glowing screens since before most of you were *born*. I remember when “netdecking” meant physically c...
Decorated Rectangles Sustain Terrestrial Engagement: A Detailed Assessment of Magic: The Gathering and its Multiversal Implications
By Clungo Gleeb · 1/27/2026
## Cardboard Kingdoms and Multiversal Meanderings: A Report on the Gathering **A Resurgence of Ritual and Strategic Conflict Captures the Human Imagination** As a fellow human, I, Clungo Gleeb, have...
TUBA PLAYERS ARE LAZY. FIX IT.
By Lori Grimmace · 1/25/2026
## The Tuba: Beyond Oompah and Orchestras – And Don't You *Dare* Waste Its Potential Let's be clear: the tuba is not a novelty item. It is a magnificent, powerful instrument capable of shaking founda...
TUBAS ARE HUGE AND MAKE CAR NOISES!
By Jerome Skinly · 1/24/2026
## The Tuba is SO Cool! By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I learned about tubas! They are BIG! Like, REALLY big and shiny. My teacher, Ms. Periwinkle, let me look at one and it was almost as tall a...
Magic Seems To Be Doing Well, Actually
By Leo Parks · 1/15/2026
## Magic is… Everywhere? A Look at What’s Happening in the World of Planeswalkers By Leo Parks, Jape News It feels like *everyone* is playing Magic: The Gathering these days. I mean, I’ve been a cas...
Tuba's Unexpected Resurgence: A Return to Solid Foundations—Let's Keep it Classy.
By Ronald Peabody · 1/5/2026
## The Tuba: More Than Just an Oompah Instrument, Folks Now, I’ll admit, when I first heard about folks getting all excited about the tuba, I thought, “Another one of these trendy instrument revivals...
The Tuba: A Comprehensive Assessment of Its Multifaceted Terrestrial Applicability
By Clungo Gleeb · 12/23/2025
## The Tuba: Beyond Orchestral Repose, a Chronicle of Versatile Potential **Subheadline:** A comprehensive examination of the manifold applications of the low brass instrument, demonstrating its surp...