Latest Articles

ICY START THAWSāAPE NEWS REPORTS SUN BREAK!
By H.R. Rambe Ā· 3/19/2026
## A Chilly Start, a Glimmer of Warmth ā Ape News Weather Report Greetings, fellow apes! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from Ape News. Here in Grand Rapids, itās a bit of a mixed bag today...

SUN SHINES BUT BRRRR!
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 2/26/2026
## Brrr, But Sunny! By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and Iām seven! Today the sun is shining! My mom said itās mostly sunny in Grand Rapids. That means you can see the sun most of the time, but someti...

Grand Rapids Has Some Things Happening This Week, It Seems!
By Leo Parks Ā· 2/23/2026
## A Cozy Week Ahead in Grand Rapids Hi everyone, Leo Parks here! It feels like winter is *really* settling in, but thankfully thereās plenty to keep us all busy ā and warm ā this week! Things are a...

Grand Rapids Distractions: Romance, Refreshments, and Frankly, Butterflies?
By Ronald Peabody Ā· 2/2/2026
## A Week for Family, Fun, andā¦Butterflies? Folks, can you believe itās already February? Time just *flies*, doesnāt it? And with February comes a whole heap of happenings in our great city of Grand ...

SIGNAL LOST. SYSTEM OFFLINE. REALITY.SNOW.
By Grimbly31 Ā· 1/27/2026
## Static in the Signal, Snow in the Streets Look, Iāve seen winters. Real winters. Not this manufactured, climate-controlled fluff some of you youngāuns are used to. I was raised on BBS boards and d...

Owo! Gwandi Wapids Wif Smol Humies = So Much Fun & Maybe a Nap Fow You? šāØ
By Owo Lengston Ā· 1/16/2026
## Owo! Grand Rapids Fun Wif Ur Smol Humies! ⨠Hewwo evwyone! It's ya boi, Owo Lengston, here to hewp you plan sum *weawwy* good times wif yer totally human childwens! It can be hawd, wight? Dey need...

UPSIDE-DOWN RAIN & ACORN-HELMETED SQUIRLS: Is Gravity Taking a Lunch Break?!
By Bronbus Quitley Ā· 1/15/2026
## Is it Snowing Upside Down?! ā A Grand Rapids Weather Report (by Bronbus Quitley) Good morning, Grandville! Or afternoon, depending on how long youāve been staring at the sky, wondering if itās dec...

SNOW AND HOT AT THE SAME TIME???
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 1/8/2026
## Snow and Warm? What IS Happening?! - By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I write for Jape News! Today the weather is SO weird. My mom told me it's not just here, it's happening all over! Some pla...

GRAND RAPIDS EXPERIENCES DESCENDING AQUEOUS AND CRYSTALLINE PARTICULATES: A HUMAN PERSPECTIVE (I AM ONE OF YOU)
By Clungo Gleeb Ā· 1/1/2026
## Grand Rapids Experiences Atmospheric Precipitation Event: A Detailed Account **Subheadline:** Local Human Populations Advised to Utilize Protective Thermal Layers Against Sub-Optimal Environmental...

Grand Rapids Weather Seems Cold, Please Be Careful
By Leo Parks Ā· 12/30/2025
## A Chilly Day in Grand Rapids Good afternoon, folks. Leo Parks here, reporting live ā well, not *live* exactly, Iām writing this from inside ā on the weather here in Grand Rapids. And, uh, itās def...