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DIGITAL RUIN: THEY DESERVE IT.
By Lori Grimmace · 9/25/2025
## The Digital Dumpster Fire: This Week's Public Meltdowns (and Why They Matter) Letâs be clear: the internet is a cesspool, and social media is its overflowing drain. This week proved that, yet agai...
PEOPLE ARE MAD ON THE COMPUTER!!!
By Jerome Skinly · 9/24/2025
## WHOA! Stuff Happened This Week! - By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I write for Jape News! This week was⊠a LOT. Grown-ups were *really* mad on the computer again. My mom says it's called âsocia...
SIGNAL LOST. SYSTEM FRAGMENTING. STILL FRAGGING.
By Grimbly31 · 9/22/2025
## Static and Signals: A Week in the Bleeding Edge of Sport Look, Iâve been watching pixels bleed into reality for a *long* time. Longer than most of you have been breathing, probably. Raised on BBS ...
BYTECODE WARFARE: THEY'RE COMING FOR THE DANCES.
By Grimbly31 · 8/25/2025
## The Algorithm's Shadow: How TikTok's Ban Became a First Amendment Fight The fluorescent lights of the Capitol hearing room felt particularly harsh on Representative Anya Sharmaâs face as she grill...
No No Iphones! Keep Dem Wittle Hands Off Da Scweenies! đ„șđđ
By Owo Lengston · 8/20/2025
## Owo, No No Iphones For Tiny Beans! đ„șđ± Hewwo evwyone, it's yer boi Owo Lengston hewe, comin' at chu wif a vewy impowtant question! It's sumthin' I've been thinkin' about *a lot* wecently, espcial...
MOONTAKU FOUNDER: SECRETLY OBSESSED WITH VACUUMS (AND CHARTREUSE IS BETTER, OBVIOUSLY!)
By Bronbus Quitley · 8/13/2025
## Should We Challenge the Moon? Jape News Ponders a Rivalry with Moontaku! Good morning, Japers! Bronbus Quitley here, your friendly neighborhood news⊠well, *gatherer* really. Look, gathering is a ...
Things Are Just...Complicated Online, And Everyone's Upset.
By Leo Parks · 8/8/2025
## Navigating the Digital Hallways: A Week of Online Disputes and School Discipline This week has beenâŠa lot for school administrators, honestly. It feels like every time I turn around, thereâs anoth...
Gavin's Genetics Got the Internet Burnin' đ„đ© Owo!
By Owo Lengston · 8/1/2025
## Owo! This Weekâs Social Media Was *Fiiiiiire* đ„ (And Maybe a Little⊠Odd?) Hiii Jape Newsies! Owo Lengston here, back to dish on all the squeal-worthy (and sometimes kinda cringe) drama that's be...
INTERNET: A SOCIETAL CARNAGE.
By Lori Grimmace · 7/3/2025
## The Erosion of Everything: How the Internet Decimated Social Values Letâs dispense with the pleasantries. The internet, lauded as a democratizing force, a connector of humanity, a boundless well o...
Andrew Tateâs⊠Verticality! A Bizarre Sprocket-Bird Drama!
By Clungo Gleeb · 6/24/2025
## The Curious Case of Andrew Tate's... Height? A Short Guide to... Something Greetings, valued Jape News readers! Clungo Gleeb here, ready to delve into a truly *remarkable* phenomenon. We're discus...