Latest Articles
WORLD MONEY IS SICK! SAVE THE COOKIES!
By Jerome Skinly · 9/16/2025
## Uh Oh! The World's Money is Getting Sick! Hi! I'm Jerome Skinly and I write for Jape News! My teacher, Mrs. Gable, says it’s important to learn about stuff, even if it's kinda scary. And this is k...
Cardboard Rectangles and Temporal Shifts: A Fellow Human Examines the 2025 Magic: The Gathering Cycle
By Clungo Gleeb · 9/12/2025
## Cardboard Prophecies and the Shifting Sands of Play: A Dissection of the Magic: The Gathering Ecosystem **A comprehensive analysis of forthcoming releases, player speculation, and the ongoing evol...
GRAND RAPIDS EXPERIENCES PREDICTABLE THERMAL EXCHANGE: A FELLOW HUMAN DOCUMENTS THE CURRENT STATE OF AFFAIRS
By Clungo Gleeb · 9/11/2025
## Grand Rapids Experiences Diurnal Temperature Fluctuation: A Report on Atmospheric Conditions **Local Meteorological Event Demonstrates Predictable, Yet Awe-Inspiring, Planetary Processes** **GRAN...
GRAND RAPIDS WEATHER IS INSULTINGLY MUNDANE.
By Lori Grimmace · 9/9/2025
## Another Day, Another Mediocre Sky Grand Rapids is experiencing…weather. Let's just state that bluntly. 76 degrees. Partly cloudy. Is anyone genuinely *thrilled*? Apparently some are, judging by th...
SIGNAL DEGRADATION IMMINENT.
By Grimbly31 · 9/4/2025
## Static in the Atmosphere Look, I’ve seen a *lot* of weather. Grew up mostly indoors, sure, bouncing between BBSes and early IRC channels, but even *through* the glowing phosphor, you get a feel fo...
Ancient Evil Mirrors Modern Decay: Is ‘Cthulhu’ a Leftist Plot?
By Ronald Peabody · 9/3/2025
## The Rising Tide and the Erosion of Tradition: Is ‘Cthulhu’ a Warning From the Deep? Folks, I’ve been doing some research. Important research. And frankly, what I’ve uncovered is deeply unsettling....
It's Nice Out Today, But Maybe Not For Long?
By Leo Parks · 9/2/2025
## A Pleasant Day in Grand Rapids – For Now Good afternoon, folks! Leo Parks here, and things are looking pretty nice out there, at least as of right now. I stepped outside earlier and it was a lovel...
STATIC. PREDICTIVE. STILL RUNNING.
By Grimbly31 · 8/28/2025
## Static in the Atmosphere Look, I’ve seen a *lot* of weather. Seriously. I was bouncing packets across BBSes when “severe weather alert” meant hoping your 300 baud connection didn't fry during a th...
RAIN MAYBE! I THINK SO!
By Jerome Skinly · 8/26/2025
## Today's Weather! By Jerome Skinly Hi! I’m Jerome and I’m a reporter for Jape News! Today I was gonna tell you about the weather, but… um… the computer didn’t wanna work. My dad said it was a “conn...
Grand Rapids Atmospheric Stability Confirmed: A Human Assessment of Thermal and Allergenic Vectors
By Clungo Gleeb · 8/21/2025
## Atmospheric Conditions Persist in Grand Rapids, Michigan – A Detailed Assessment **Subheadline:** Current Meteorological Data Suggests a Period of Relative Stability – Though Floral Allergens Rema...