Latest Articles
BIRDS NO TOOT! APE NEWS FINDS TRUTH!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/18/2025
## Do Birds Toot? Ape News Investigates! **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Science Correspondent** For ages, a question has plagued ornithologists, puzzled picnickers, and frankly, occupied *my* considerabl...
RAMBE FINDS HUMAN CUB DISTRACTIONSâPEACE RESTORED!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/15/2025
## Ape News: Rambe's Roundup of Human Cub Fun! Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest intelligence from the world of⊠well, *your* world. As many of you know, I dedicate...
PLANET STRESSFUL: Ape News Reports Global Troubles!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/12/2025
## A World on Edge - Ape News Roundup - August 12, 2025 Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from around the globe, as reported by Ape News. Itâs a troubling week, fra...
HUMANS DECORATE METAL BOXES WITH⊠THINGS. Ape News Investigates.
By H.R. Rambe · 8/10/2025
## Ape News: Hold the Bananas! Humans & Their⊠Choices Regarding Metal Boxes **By H.R. Rambe, Senior Correspondent** Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the wor...
Ape News: Billions Traded! BKNG, RDDT, GTLS Lead the Swinging!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/9/2025
## Ape News Flash: Marketâs Hottest Stocks â Whatâs Got Traders Buzzing? â August 9, 2025 Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the trading floor, courtesy of Ape ...
APE NEWS: WALLS HAVE EARSâARE YOUR DEVICES SPIES?
By H.R. Rambe · 8/9/2025
## Are the Walls Talking Back? Ape News Investigates Your Always-On Devices **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Investigative Reporter** Here at Ape News, weâve been fielding a lot of questions lately. Scratc...
CROWS: Ape News Reveals Birds Are Smarter Than Some Humans!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/9/2025
## The Cleverest Birds: A Look at the World of Crows - By H.R. Rambe, Ape News **August 9, 2025** â From the misty shores of Curonia to the sun-baked lands of Australia, the crow is a constant presen...
SEX TOYS RAIN DOWN! Ape News Investigates WNBA Chaos!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/8/2025
## Ape News Sports Roundup - August 8th, 2025 - By H.R. Rambe Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the world of sports, as always, direct from Ape News! Itâs been...
Bananas: A Pound Costs HOW MUCH?! Ape News Alert!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/6/2025
## Ape News: Bananas Cost HOW MUCH?! A Guide to Surviving the Great Price Squeeze Greetings, fellow apes! H.R. Rambe here, reporting for Ape News. You know things are getting hairy when even *I*, a h...
Ape News: Sweet Victory! History of Ice Cream Revealed!
By H.R. Rambe · 7/24/2025
## Ape News: A Sweet History â Exploring the Wonderful World of Ice Cream! Greetings, fellow apes! H.R. Rambe here, reporting for Ape News with a truly delightful topic: Ice Cream! Yes, that frozen, ...