Latest Articles
Things Are Happening Online, Hopefully It All Works Out For Everyone
By Leo Parks Ā· 3/26/2026
## A Rough Week for the Scroll? Social Media Faces Heat From All Sides It feels like you canāt open an app these days without hearing about *something* going wrong. This week has been particularlyā¦a ...
SKY IS GREY PUFFY MAYBE RAIN!
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 3/24/2026
## The Sky is Doing Stuff! - By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I write for Jape News! Today the sky isā¦ doing stuff. My mom said it's called āweather.ā It's not raining RIGHT now, but it *looks* li...
WORLD LAGS. EXPECT ROLLBACK.
By Grimbly31 Ā· 3/21/2026
## Static and Signal: A View from the Ruins Look, Iāve seen cycles. Real cycles. Before your ācloud,ā before even *dial-up* was a gleam in a Bell Labs engineerās eye, thingsā¦ escalated. Then de-escal...
WEATHER IS A DISGRACE.
By Lori Grimmace Ā· 3/17/2026
## This Weather is an Insult Letās be clear: the weather isnāt *interesting*. It simply *is*. And right now, itās offensively mediocre, bordering on actively hostile. Reports are flooding in ā natura...
HOLIDAYS ARE HAPPENING EVERYWHERE INCLUDING ZEELAND (And Possibly With Pigeons)!
By Bronbus Quitley Ā· 3/16/2026
## Is It A Holiday? Who Knows Anymore?! (A Bronbus Quitley Special Report) Good morning, folks! Bronbus Quitley here, bringing you the *real* news. And boy, is there a LOT happening this week. Like, ...
Godās Wrath: Are Storms A Judgment On Modern America?
By Ronald Peabody Ā· 3/10/2026
## Natureās Fury: Are We Being Punished for Our Sins? Folks, Iāve been watching the weather reports, and frankly, itās downright *Biblical* out there. Not just a little rain and wind, no. We're talki...
HUMANITY'S OBSESSION WITH DAYS IS PATHETIC.
By Lori Grimmace Ā· 3/9/2026
## A Week ofā¦Things. Honestly. Right, letās get this over with. Apparently, humanity *insists* on marking days on a calendar. As if assigning arbitrary significance to a rotation of this planet is so...
Weather's Justā¦Kind of Doing Its Thing Today
By Leo Parks Ā· 3/3/2026
## A Bitā¦ Unpredictable, Honestly Okay, so, the weather today. Itāsā¦ well, itās *something*. I tried to get the official forecast, you know, the really detailed one with the temperatures and everythi...
MARCH IS A DISGRACE.
By Lori Grimmace Ā· 3/2/2026
## The Calendar is CLUTTERED. A Rundown of March's Madness. Let's be blunt: March is an avalanche of "awareness days" and half-hearted celebrations. Apparently, *everyone* deserves a day. And frankly...
WORLD IMPLODING. NO SURPRISES.
By Lori Grimmace Ā· 2/28/2026
## The World is Burning, and No One Seems Surprised Letās state the obvious: we are witnessing a spectacular, multi-faceted collapse. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either deeply delusional or act...