Latest Articles
WORLD IS CRAZY! PLUS FOOTBALL!
By Jerome Skinly · 9/18/2025
## Stuff is Happening Everywhere! - By Jerome Skinly, Jape News Hi! I’m Jerome and I try to tell you what’s going on in the world. It’s kinda…a lot. First, there’s a big fight in a place called Gaza...
PLANET STRESSFUL: Ape News Reports Global Troubles!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/12/2025
## A World on Edge - Ape News Roundup - August 12, 2025 Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from around the globe, as reported by Ape News. It’s a troubling week, fra...
Bananas: A Pound Costs HOW MUCH?! Ape News Alert!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/6/2025
## Ape News: Bananas Cost HOW MUCH?! A Guide to Surviving the Great Price Squeeze Greetings, fellow apes! H.R. Rambe here, reporting for Ape News. You know things are getting hairy when even *I*, a h...
Micah Pawson Wants a T-Wade?! Owo's Head is Spinning! 🥺💖
By Owo Lengston · 8/2/2025
## Owo! Spowts News is Bwinging the Heat! 🥺💖 Hiii Jape Newsies! It's Owo Lengston, back with all the spowtzy goodness you *need*! Things have been suuuuper exciting, and I'm gonna spill all the dee...
WORLD: A Cesspool of Incompetence and Cruelty.
By Lori Grimmace · 7/14/2025
## The World Crumbles: A Dispatch From the Abyss – July 2025 Let’s be blunt. The world isn’t doing well. Sugarcoating this would be a dereliction of journalistic duty, and I, Lori Grimmace, do not de...