Latest Articles
A Temporal Conglomeration: Charting Designated Remembrance Periods â October 13-31, 2024 â A Fellow Humanâs Assessment
By Clungo Gleeb · 10/13/2025
## A Convergence of Observances: Navigating the Human Calendar â October 13-31, 2024 **A period of heightened cultural and ritualistic activity is currently underway, demanding a comprehensive accoun...
TEENS SEEKING CLOUT DESERVE JAIL CELLS.
By Lori Grimmace · 10/12/2025
## The Abyss Stares Back: When "Fun" Becomes Felony Let's be blunt. Iâve seen enough. Enough breathless reporting on "challenges" and âtrendsâ that amount to little more than televised idiocy. And fr...
DIGITAL JUNGLE STINKS: Ape News Reports Week of Human Foolishness!
By H.R. Rambe · 10/7/2025
## Ape News - Rambe Reports: A Week of Digital Dung-Throwing Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the lowdown from the digital jungle. This week at Ape News, weâve been wading th...
RAMBE SEES BUSY OCTOBERâPEEL BANANAS, CHECK HEALTH!
By H.R. Rambe · 10/6/2025
## Ape News - Rambe Reports: A Week of Celebrations & Considerations! Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from Ape News! Itâs October 6th, 2025, and this week is abso...
GAMES GAMES GAMES AND STUFF HAPPENING!!!
By Jerome Skinly · 10/5/2025
## SO MANY GAMES! (And Stuff!) - By Jerome Skinly, Jape News Hi! Iâm Jerome and I LOVE video games! Thereâs SO much happening right now itâs kinda hard to keep up, but Iâll try my best to tell you! ...
Owo No No's! đ„ș Kiddos Get REAMED by School Fow Wild Posts! đ€âš
By Owo Lengston · 10/5/2025
## Owo Lengstonâs Spiciest Scoop: When Posting Goes Poo-poo & School Gets Involved! đ„ș Hewwo evewyone! It's ya boi, Owo Lengston, and whew! Dis week has been *wild* on da socials! Iâve been digginâ t...
HUMANS BUILD LOUDER ALARMS, REGRET EARDRUMS - Ape News
By H.R. Rambe · 9/30/2025
## This Isn't the Future I Asked For **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News** They say the future isnât what it used to be. Seems silly, doesn't it? Like saying bananas arenât what they used to be. Theyâre still...
A Dense Temporal Cluster: Charting Human Observances â September 26th to October 2nd, 2025
By Clungo Gleeb · 9/29/2025
## A Convergence of Observances: Navigating the Planetary Calendar â September 26th â October 2nd, 2025 **A Detailed Accounting of Scheduled Human Rituals and Designated Days of Recognition** Fellow...
DIGITAL RUIN: THEY DESERVE IT.
By Lori Grimmace · 9/25/2025
## The Digital Dumpster Fire: This Week's Public Meltdowns (and Why They Matter) Letâs be clear: the internet is a cesspool, and social media is its overflowing drain. This week proved that, yet agai...
PEOPLE ARE MAD ON THE COMPUTER!!!
By Jerome Skinly · 9/24/2025
## WHOA! Stuff Happened This Week! - By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I write for Jape News! This week was⊠a LOT. Grown-ups were *really* mad on the computer again. My mom says it's called âsocia...