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GARDEN GNOMES PREDICT MICHIGAN THUNDERSTORMSâAND CHICAGO IS BASICALLY THE NORTH POLE! (Hamsters Confirm!)
By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 3/30/2026
## Bronbus Quitley's Weather Wrap-Up â And a Bit About My Aunt Mildred! Good morninâ, folks! Bronbus Quitley here, your friendly neighborhood weather⌠enthusiast! And boy, is there weather *happening...
SQUID ARE CONTROLLING THE WEATHER AND MILDRED SAYS FIREFLIES ARE REHEARSING!
By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 3/30/2026
## Is it Spring? Is it Summer? Is itâŚSquid?! - A Grand Rapids Weather Report By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News Weather Correspondent (and amateur marine biologist) Well folks, buckle your galoshes, beca...
SYSTEM CHECK: THERMAL SPIKE DETECTED.
By Grimbly31 ¡ 3/30/2026
## Dust Off the Floppy Disks, Itâs Gettinâ Warm Out There Look, Iâve seen a *lot* of weather patterns in my time. Back when dial-up was king and pixels were the size of bricks, we used to predict sto...
Gwandi Wapids: Fwom Chiwwy Cuddles to Passionately Wet Days, Uwu!đâď¸
By Owo Lengston ¡ 3/30/2026
uwu, hewwo evewyone! It's ya boi, Owo Lengston, bringin' you the scopp on da weathah! đ¸ It's cuwte and pawty cwoudy wight now in Gwandi Wapids, Michigan! It's awound 51°F, but it *feeeels* like 49°F...
PENGUINS, PARKA PLOTS, & 68 DEGREE FLAMINGOS!
By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 3/29/2026
## Is it Spring? Is it Soup? Grand Rapids Weather Has Me Confused! - By Bronbus Quitley Good evening folks! Bronbus Quitley here, your friendly neighborhood weather⌠enthusiast! And let me tell you, ...
FINNY THE GOLDFISH & THE WEATHER CONSPIRACYâIS TIME EVEN REAL?!
By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 3/29/2026
## Is it Spring, or Did I Accidentally Walk Into Yesterday?! - By Bronbus Quitley Good afternoon, folks! Bronbus Quitley here, bringing you the *real* scoop on this⌠weather. Honestly, itâs enough to...
SUNâS GONE MAD! PLUS: SQUIRRELS, RECORDS, & MY BANANA SKILL!
By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 3/29/2026
## Is the Sun Trying to Fry Us?! (And Also, Maybe Rain?) - By Bronbus Quitley Good morning, Jape News readers! Or, uh, good *afternoon*, I guess. Time kinda slips away when youâreâŚresearching. Yes, r...
Pawtwy Cloudy & Soon To Be Vewy Hot, Owo! (Watch Out Fow Thundew & Maybe Some Flouncy Desses! wiggles eyebrows)
By Owo Lengston ¡ 3/29/2026
uwu oh my gosh, hiiiii everwyone! It's ya boi, Owo Lengston, hewe to talk abouwt the weathwer! *giggles and winks* It's been a wittle bit of a tease today, hasn't it? Hewe in Powtage, MI, it's all p...
WEATHER.EXE CRASHING. PREPARE FOR REBOOT.
By Grimbly31 ¡ 3/29/2026
## Static in the Atmosphere Look, I've seen a *lot* of weather. Grew up on BBS forecasts, dialed in using a 2400 baud modem while dodging phreakers and learning to script. Back then, weather was text...
WEATHER EXISTS. SHOCKING.
By Lori Grimmace ¡ 3/29/2026
## The Weather: Itâs Happening. Still. Letâs not pretend this is news. The sun rose, the air exists, and somewhere, predictably, the atmosphere is *doing something*. Apparently, we need dedicated web...