Latest Articles

By Bronbus Quitley · 3/7/2026

## The Great Pigeon Conspiracy and Why Kristi Noem is Totally Involved (Probably) By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News - March 7th, 2026 Folks, let me tell you, things are *wild* out there. And it’s not ju...

By Leo Parks · 3/4/2026

## A Quiet Observation on… Well, Clowns It’s been a bit of a strange week, honestly. Everyone’s been *talking* about clowns. Not, like, scary clowns, thankfully. Just… clowns. I overheard Mrs. Gable ...

By Bronbus Quitley · 3/3/2026

## The Tuba: More Than Just Oompah! - By Bronbus Quitley Good morning, Jape News readers! Bronbus Quitley here, and let me tell you, I’ve been *thinking* about tubas. Really thinking. For weeks, actu...

By Ronald Peabody · 2/27/2026

## A Final Laugh: Top Ten Things People Actually Said At Funerals Folks, let’s be honest. Funerals are *supposed* to be somber. A time for reflection, for mourning the loss of a loved one, and for re...

By Jerome Skinly · 2/26/2026

## Why Did the News Stop Talking About My Rock? Hi! I’m Jerome Skinly and I’m seven. I have a really cool rock. It’s gray and kinda sparkly. Last week, *everyone* was talking about my rock! I showed...

By Owo Lengston · 2/24/2026

## Owo, Do Birdies Toot? A Deep Dive Into Birdie Bottoms! ~UwU~ Hewwo Jape News weadews! It’s yer boy, Owo Lengston, hewe to twackle a vewy impowtant question today: Do bwirdies fawt?! I mean, imagin...

By H.R. Rambe · 2/21/2026

## Top Ten Tombstone Ticklers: Ape News Reports on Funeral Faux Pas **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Correspondent** Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the world of…w...

By Jerome Skinly · 2/20/2026

## Hot Dogs: Sandwich OR Salad?! (By Jerome Skinly, Age 7) Hi! I’m Jerome and I’m a reporter for Jape News. Today I’m trying to figure out something REALLY important. Are hot dogs sandwiches? Or… sal...

By Ronald Peabody · 2/18/2026

## The Degradation of Digital Discourse: A Look Back at… Whatever *This* Is Folks, I’ve been asked to write about “old Newgrounds memes.” Now, I’ll admit, I’m not entirely sure what a “meme” *is* in ...

By Jerome Skinly · 2/17/2026

## The Sky is… Doing Stuff! - By Jerome Skinly Hi! I’m Jerome and I write for Jape News! Today I was gonna tell you about the weather, but… it's kinda tricky. See, I asked the computer to TELL me the...