Latest Articles
NEBRASKA UNDER SIEGE! GIANT, CINNAMON-SCENTED WEASELS PLOT GLOBAL DOMINATION! (My Chihuahua Knows!)
By Bronbus Quitley · 7/28/2025
## Nebraska Under Siege! Weasels! Weasels Everywhere! (And They Smell!) **By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News Staff – July 28, 2025** Folks, I’ve seen some things in my years covering the cornfields of Ne...
Squirrels Sabotage Shipping! Hamster-Powered Trains?! Bronbus Knows!
By Bronbus Quitley · 7/10/2025
## The Mighty Machine: A Look at How America Moves Its Stuff (And Why It's a Bit Dizzy Right Now) – By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News Well hello there, folks! Bronbus Quitley here, reporting live (well, ...
Crows: Ancient Messengers or Modern Menace?
By Ronald Peabody · 7/8/2025
## The Shadowed Wing: A Chronicle of the Crow Across Cultures and Time **(Jape News, July 12, 2025 - By Ronald Peabody)** They’re everywhere, aren't they? Perched atop telephone wires, scavenging in...
BEAVERS WROTE DECLARATION?! Fireworks Could Launch HOTDOGS?! July 4th INSANITY!
By Bronbus Quitley · 7/4/2025
## Boom! Sparkle! It's the Fourth of July! (And Did You Know Beavers Helped Write the Declaration?) Greetings, Jape News readers! Bronbus Quitley here, reporting live – well, sort of live, the pigeon...
SQUIRRELS! MONOCLES! MY MARMALADE IS RUINED! A KEY CRISIS OF EPIC PROPORTIONS!
By Bronbus Quitley · 7/1/2025
## The Great Key Kerfuffle of '25! (And My Day Is Officially Ruined) Right then! Let’s just… *deep breath*… let’s talk about my keys. Yes, MY keys. Those vital, little pieces of metal that apparently...
Cats Teaching Raccoons to Steal Gas: A National Menace!
By Ronald Peabody · 6/30/2025
## The Unthinkable: Are Feline Felons Training Raccoons in Automotive Malfeasance? **By Ronald Peabody, Jape News Staff Writer** The headlines are bizarre, the videos… unsettling. Reports are floodi...