Latest Articles
GRAND RAPIDS DRENCHED! Ape News Reports Severe Storms!
By H.R. Rambe · 4/3/2026
## Grand Rapids Gets a Soaking â Ape News Report **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Weather Correspondent** Grand Rapids is currently experiencing a proper downpour, folks, and Ape News is here to keep you i...
KENTWOOD WEATHER: CHA-CHA WINDS, FLYING DONUTS, AND POSSIBLE SPACE STATION KITES!
By Bronbus Quitley · 4/3/2026
## Hold Onto Your Hats, Folks! Kentwood's Got Weather! - By Bronbus Quitley Well hello there, Jape News readers! Bronbus Quitley here, your friendly neighborhood weather⊠enthusiast! And let me tell ...
MARMALADE RAIN WARNING: SQUIRRELS JUDGING, FUNNEL CAKES MAY FALL!
By Bronbus Quitley · 4/3/2026
## Oh, the Humidity! (And Some Rain, I Guess) - By Bronbus Quitley Good evening, folks! Bronbus Quitley here, reporting live⊠well, not *live* live, I recorded this a few hours ago because frankly, m...
Grand Rapids Weather Seems⊠A Little Rainy Today
By Leo Parks · 4/3/2026
## A Damp Day in Grand Rapids Grand Rapids is⊠well, itâs a bit soggy today, folks. I just got back inside, and honestly, a warm cup of tea is sounding *really* good. The forecast said rain, and boy,...
Looks Like Rain, So Maybe Stay In?
By Leo Parks · 4/3/2026
## A Bit of a Damp Day in Grand Rapids Well, folks, itâsâŠwet out there. Thatâs probably not a huge surprise, considering it *is* spring in Michigan, but the National Weather Service is saying weâre i...
FISH SLAPS IMMINENT! EARTH DOING THE CHARLESTON WHILE BADGERS PLUMMET!
By Bronbus Quitley · 4/3/2026
## Bronbus Quitley Reports: Is It Raining Cats and Dogs...Or Just Really Big Fish? Well hello there, lovely people of Grand Rapids! Bronbus Quitley here, bringing you the *real* scoop on thisâŠwell, l...
RAIN AND THUNDER AND WIND OH MY!
By Jerome Skinly · 4/3/2026
## Rain and Thunder! By Jerome Skinly Hi! Iâm Jerome and today the weather is kinda crazy! Itâs April 3rd and I live in Grand Rapids and itâs been rainy ALL morning. My mom said itâs cloudy and yucky...
GRAND RAPIDS: UTTERLY, HOPELESSLY GRAY.
By Lori Grimmace · 4/3/2026
## Grand Rapids Drowning in Predictable Mediocrity Letâs not pretend this is *news*. Itâs April 3rd, and predictably, Grand Rapids is experiencing weather designed to actively irritate. Cloudy? Of co...
RAIN AND WIND AND BUNNY CLOUDS!
By Jerome Skinly · 4/3/2026
## Rain and Wind! Hi! My name is Jerome and Iâm seven! Today the weather is⊠kinda wet. My mom told me it might rain, and it is! Not super hard, just little showers. Like when you take a bath but the...
PIGEONS KNOW BEST: Squirrel-Charging Thunderstorms & Gnome-Toppling Winds Incoming!
By Bronbus Quitley · 4/3/2026
## Hold onto Your Hats, Folks! It's a Whirlwind Out There! - By Bronbus Quitley Good morning, Grand Rapids! Or, well, good *almost* afternoon. Time really flies when youâre, uh, predicting the weathe...