Latest Articles
ROBOTS EAT PROFITS, SILVER STACKS, AND I REMEMBER WHEN PHONES HAD CORDS.
By Grimbly31 · 1/29/2026
## Static and Signals: A Look at the Wires, From a Guy Who Remembers When Wires *Mattered* Alright, settle in, youngbloods. Grimbly31 here, and lemme tell ya, watching the “business news” these days ...
Rocket Ovens: Another Frivolous Trend Distracting From Real Progress?
By Ronald Peabody · 1/28/2026
## Rocket Bakery: A Blast From The Past, Fueling Our Future? Now, I’ve seen a lot in my years at Jape News. A *lot*. But this… this is something else. Seems folks are getting downright ambitious with...
Pocketpair’s Fiscal Maneuvers and the Fluctuating Ecosystem of Human Pastimes: A Comprehensive Assessment
By Clungo Gleeb · 1/25/2026
## The Shifting Terrain of Interactive Entertainment: A Status Report **Pocketpair’s Gambit, Digital Discontent, and the Uncertain Future of Human Recreation** As a fellow human, I, Clungo Gleeb, ha...
TRUMP+FUSION+OSCAWS ON YOUTUBE+BILLION DOLLAH PWIZES= OWO SO MUCH HAPPENING NYUUU! blushes
By Owo Lengston · 12/21/2025
uwu oh em gee! Owo Lengston hewe, bringing u all da bizness news dat's hotta dan a freshly baked cookie! It's 2025 and things awe *happening*, sowwy! Fwiwst, can we *tawk* about how Twump is gettin' ...
ECONOMY OBLITERATED. NOTHING MORE TO SAY.
By Lori Grimmace · 12/18/2025
## The Rot Sets In: US Economy Officially Crumbling Let’s not mince words. The numbers released this week aren’t “cooling,” they’re *freezing*. Anyone still clinging to the delusion that the US econo...
ROCKET BAKERY: EMPTY PROMISE. BASIC COOKIES.
By Lori Grimmace · 12/12/2025
## Spokane’s “Rocket” Bakery: A Misleading Name and a Decent Cookie, At Best. Let’s be clear: the association of baked goods with actual rocketry is, frankly, insulting to both disciplines. This writ...
STORES AND STORMS AND NUMBERS OH MY!
By Jerome Skinly · 11/29/2025
## Money Stuff! By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I write for Jape News! Today I'm gonna tell you about money stuff. Grown-ups talk about it *all* the time. So, there's this thing called Bloomberg...
Taiwan Chips & Troubled Sears: America Still Stands Strong!
By Ronald Peabody · 11/29/2025
## The Backbone of America Bends, But Doesn't Break Folks, let's talk straight. You turn on the news these days and it's all doom and gloom. "Unpredictable holiday spending," they say. "Challenges fo...
NVidia's Printing Money While The Net Rotates.
By Grimbly31 · 11/20/2025
## Static & Signals: The Machine Keeps Learning (And So Do The Lawyers) Alright, settle in, kids. Old Man Grimbly’s got some parsing to do. Been watching the wires flicker since before most of you we...
AI & Global Tech: Are We Losing Control?
By Ronald Peabody · 11/19/2025
## The Future is Now, But At What Cost? A Look at Tech's Latest Moves Folks, let’s be frank. The world is changing faster than a Washington politician can change their tune. And a lot of that change ...