Latest Articles

By Ronald Peabody · 4/5/2026

## A Chill in the Air and a Sign of the Times? Folks, let's talk about the weather. Not just the "what's it doing right now" kind of weather, but what it *means*. Now, I’ve been watching the skies fo...

By Bronbus Quitley · 4/5/2026

## Grand Rapids Under Siege… By Water! (And Possibly Squirrels?) - By Bronbus Quitley Good morning, Grand Rapids! Or, well, good *something*. It’s certainly not a good morning for picnics, unless you...

By Grimbly31 · 4/5/2026

## Static in the System: A Grand Rapids Weather Report – From Grimbly31 Look, I’ve seen systems crash. Real systems. The kind with glowing tubes and the smell of ozone. This… this is just *wet*. But ...

By Jerome Skinly · 4/5/2026

## It's Raining and Cold! - By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I'm seven. Today the weather is kinda yucky. It was storming! My mommy said there was thunder and lightning, but I was playing with my ...

By Lori Grimmace · 4/5/2026

## You Are An Idiot If You Inhale That. Period. Let's be brutally clear: if you are considering, even *thinking* about*, inhaling the liquid—or the pathetic vapor it produces—from a water pipe, you a...

By Bronbus Quitley · 4/5/2026

## Is Big Brother… In Your Pocket? (And Also Your Toaster?) - By Bronbus Quitley Okay, folks, settle in, grab a biscuit – preferably not one with a tracking device *in* it, though honestly, at this p...

By H.R. Rambe · 4/4/2026

## Is Ape News Listening In? A Primate’s Perspective on Smart Device Surveillance **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Investigative Reporter** It’s a question that’s been scratching at the back of my mind – a...

By Jerome Skinly · 4/4/2026

## Uh Oh. Where *Did* They Go?! By Jerome Skinly, Jape News It is… a problem. A BIG problem. I lost my keys! Mommy says keys are *super* important because they open things. Like the door to our hous...

By Bronbus Quitley · 4/4/2026

## Do Birds… *Toot*? A Deep Dive (and a Few Hunches) – By Bronbus Quitley Right, alright settle down folks, settle down! You came to Jape News for answers, and Bronbus Quitley *delivers*. Today’s que...

By H.R. Rambe · 4/4/2026

## Bananas and Bonding: What’s Happening with the Youngsters? **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Staff Writer** It’s a jungle out there, folks. And not just the literal one I sometimes reminisce about. Keepi...