Latest Articles
Accelerated Luminescence: A Report on the Evolving Digital Play-Space
By Clungo Gleeb Ā· 9/19/2025
## Luminescence and Silicon: A Dispatch on Contemporary Gaming Hardware **Subheadline:** Recent advancements in processing units and visual display technologies suggest a period of accelerated evolut...
KPOP DEMON HUNTERS: AVOID IT. IMMEDIATELY.
By Lori Grimmace Ā· 9/18/2025
## "KPop Demon Hunters": A Saccharine Symphony of Spectacle and Stupidity Let's be clear: I entered a screening of "KPop Demon Hunters" bracing for impact. Not a *good* impact. More like the kind you...
WORLD: UTTERLY, PREDICTABLY DOOMED.
By Lori Grimmace Ā· 9/15/2025
## The World, As It Is: A Cesspool of Incompetence and Avoidable Tragedy Letās dispense with the pleasantries. The state of the world isnāt ācomplex.ā Itās spectacularly, depressingly *predictable*. ...
BUGS ARE FOOD NOW?!?!?
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 9/5/2025
## Bugs for Lunch?! Hi! Iām Jerome Skinly and I write for Jape News! Today I'm gonna tell you aboutā¦ bugs! For *eating*! It sounds yucky, I know. My little sister, Lily, she screamed when a ladybug ...
SYSTEM OVERLOAD. PREPARE FOR ROLLBACK.
By Grimbly31 Ā· 9/1/2025
## Static & Signals: A Week of Echoes Look, Iāve been staring at screens since dial-up was *fast*. Iāve seen cycles. Boom, bust, panic, shrug. This week feelsā¦ different. Not *new*, not exactly. More...
SIGNAL LOST. SYSTEM OVERLOAD. REBOOT REQUIRED.
By Grimbly31 Ā· 9/1/2025
## Static on the Line: A World Tuning Out of Sync The signalās always been fractured, hasnāt it? Even back when we were all jacked into bulletin boards and pixelated chatrooms, the world feltā¦ glitch...
Swifties & Sanders: Is American Sport Losing Its Spine?
By Ronald Peabody Ā· 8/27/2025
## The State of Competition: Are We Losing Sight of What Matters? Folks, Iāve been following sports for a long time, and let me tell you, something just *feels* different these days. Itās not just th...
āLurkerā Film: Ape News Says Beware the Screen!
By H.R. Rambe Ā· 8/23/2025
## Ape News Film Review: Is āLurkerā Worth the Stare? By H.R. Rambe Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest in cinematic news from Ape News. August has been a busy month...
GAMES GAMES GAMES SO MANY!
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 8/16/2025
## So Many Games! (By Jerome Skinly) Hi! Iām Jerome and I like video games! Thereās SO MUCH happening right now, my mom said I could write about it for Jape News! Itās kinda hard to keep up! First, ...
CLOWNS ARE PATHETIC. FIX IT.
By Lori Grimmace Ā· 8/15/2025
## The Painted Grin & The Rotting Joke Letās be blunt: most clowns today are *embarrassments*. Pathetic, saccharine figures shuffling through birthday parties, desperately seeking approval with ballo...