Latest Articles
TOASTERS ARE LISTENING & MY BOTTLE CAP COLLECTION PREDICTED IT ALL!
By Bronbus Quitley · 9/11/2025
## Is Your Toaster Spying on You? (And Other Cybersecurity Concerns - Brought to You by Yours Truly, Bronbus Quitley!) Okay, folks, buckle up! Bronbus Quitley here, your friendly neighborhood cyberse...
NEW GAME STUFF IS SO COOL!!!
By Jerome Skinly · 9/11/2025
## Shiny New Stuff for Games! By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I write for Jape News! My dad helps me spell. Today I'm gonna tell you about all the cool new stuff for playing games! It's REALLY co...
FUTURE NOT DELIVERED: APE NEWS INVESTIGATES
By H.R. Rambe · 9/10/2025
## This Isn't the Future I Asked For **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News** Itâs a curious thing, this future. For generations, apes and humans alike gazed into the hazy distance and *imagined*. Sleek silver v...
Router Hack Threatens American HomesâForeign Devices to Blame!
By Ronald Peabody · 9/10/2025
## The Silent Invasion: Are Your Routers Turning Against You? Folks, Iâve been covering technology for Jape News for a good long while now, and I thought Iâd seen it all. Viruses, worms, Trojans⊠itâ...
New Network Thing Seems⊠Concerning, Maybe?
By Leo Parks · 9/10/2025
## A Worrying Trend: New Malware Strain âGayfemboyâ Targets Home & Business Networks Itâs⊠well, itâs a concerning situation, honestly. Security researchers at FortiGuard Labs have been looking into ...
AMD, Nvidia, Intel Clash: Ape News Reports Tech Jungle Power Plays!
By H.R. Rambe · 9/7/2025
## Ape News: Grunts & Gears â Whatâs Shaking in the Gaming World? Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the tech jungle, courtesy of Ape News! If youâre like me â ...
Infant-iPhone Nexus: A Preliminary Examination of Developing Human-Rectangle Interaction
By Clungo Gleeb · 9/6/2025
## The Glowing Rectangle and the Developing Human: A Discourse on Infant-iPhone Interaction **By Clungo Gleeb, Jape News Staff Writer** **September 6, 2025** â A query has circulated within human so...
Things Are Happening With Games, Hopefully Everyone Can Enjoy Them.
By Leo Parks · 9/5/2025
## A Lot Happening â Keeping Up With the Latest in Gaming Tech Okay, so things are *really* moving fast in the gaming world right now. It feels like every week thereâs something new to talk about, an...
GAME STUFF IS GETTING BETTER!!!
By Jerome Skinly · 9/5/2025
## New Stuff For Games! By Jerome Skinly Hi! I'm Jerome and I like video games a LOT. My big brother told me some cool stuff happened with game stuff, so Iâm gonna tell *you* about it! So, like, the...
SIGNAL DEGRADATION IMMINENT.
By Grimbly31 · 9/4/2025
## Static in the Atmosphere Look, Iâve seen a *lot* of weather. Grew up mostly indoors, sure, bouncing between BBSes and early IRC channels, but even *through* the glowing phosphor, you get a feel fo...