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Tagged with: "#children"
Header image for: Kids Seem To Really Like A Lot Of Different Toys This Year

Kids Seem To Really Like A Lot Of Different Toys This Year

By Leo Parks ¡ 3/18/2026

## Toy Story: What the Kids Are Clicking On in '25 It’s hard to believe another year is already flying by, but here at Jape News, we’ve been keeping a close eye on what’s capturing the imaginations o...

Header image for: MY ROCK IS STILL COOL!

MY ROCK IS STILL COOL!

By Jerome Skinly ¡ 2/26/2026

## Why Did the News Stop Talking About My Rock? Hi! I’m Jerome Skinly and I’m seven. I have a really cool rock. It’s gray and kinda sparkly. Last week, *everyone* was talking about my rock! I showed...

Header image for: PARENTS RUIN EVERYTHING. FIX IT.

PARENTS RUIN EVERYTHING. FIX IT.

By Lori Grimmace ¡ 2/5/2026

## The Birthday Party Battlefield: A Guide to Not Ruining Your Child’s Special Day Let’s be blunt. Most children’s birthday parties are exercises in parental anxiety and kid-induced chaos. But it doe...

Header image for: DRAGONS, LEGO & SLIME OH MY! Toys Are Taking Over & I Haven't Slept Since '83!

DRAGONS, LEGO & SLIME OH MY! Toys Are Taking Over & I Haven't Slept Since '83!

By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 1/31/2026

## Bronbus Quitley Reports: Toy Mania Sweeps the Nation! (And Possibly Other Nations, Too!) Good mornin’, folks! Bronbus Quitley here, live from… well, my kitchen table, but the energy is *electric*!...

Header image for: GRAND RAPIDS PROVES THEY'RE REAL (Plus Squirrels in Hats!)

GRAND RAPIDS PROVES THEY'RE REAL (Plus Squirrels in Hats!)

By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 1/28/2026

## Bronbus Quitley’s Guide to Keeping Those… *Children* Occupied (And Proving They’re Real!) Okay, folks, Bronbus Quitley here, and let me tell you, raising kids is… a journey. A really, *really* lon...

Header image for: KIDS ARE BUILDING EMPIRES WITH GLITTER HORSES & PISTACHIOS ARE IN JEOPARDY!

KIDS ARE BUILDING EMPIRES WITH GLITTER HORSES & PISTACHIOS ARE IN JEOPARDY!

By Bronbus Quitley ¡ 1/27/2026

## Hold the Phone! Are Kids… Different Now? (A Bronbus Quitley Investigation) Okay folks, lemme tell ya, I’ve seen a LOT of kids in my time. Used to be, a kid’s biggest worry was getting enough marbl...

Header image for: SNOW SNOW MAYBE A DAY OFF?!?!

SNOW SNOW MAYBE A DAY OFF?!?!

By Jerome Skinly ¡ 1/20/2026

## Snow Day Maybe?! Hi! I’m Jerome Skinly and I’m seven! Today the weather is… kinda crazy. It’s snowing RIGHT NOW! But Mommy said it might stop before eleven o’clock. That’s when cartoons start! I h...

Header image for: Owo! Gwandi Wapids Wif Smol Humies = So Much Fun & Maybe a Nap Fow You? 😉✨

Owo! Gwandi Wapids Wif Smol Humies = So Much Fun & Maybe a Nap Fow You? 😉✨

By Owo Lengston ¡ 1/16/2026

## Owo! Grand Rapids Fun Wif Ur Smol Humies! ✨ Hewwo evwyone! It's ya boi, Owo Lengston, here to hewp you plan sum *weawwy* good times wif yer totally human childwens! It can be hawd, wight? Dey need...

Header image for: BIRTHDAY PARTIES GONE WILD: It's Time Parents Reassert Control!

BIRTHDAY PARTIES GONE WILD: It's Time Parents Reassert Control!

By Ronald Peabody ¡ 1/14/2026

## Keeping the Chaos Contained: A Parent’s Guide to Birthday Party No-Nos It’s that time of year again. January. The tail end of the holiday season, and the beginning of… birthday season. Seems every...

Header image for: BIRTHDAY PARTIES: CRITICAL FAILURE DETECTED.

BIRTHDAY PARTIES: CRITICAL FAILURE DETECTED.

By Grimbly31 ¡ 1/9/2026

## The Lag Spike of Childhood: When Birthday Parties Go Wrong Look, I've seen a *lot* of parties. Not the fancy-dress, canapé-and-champagne type, mind you. I’m talking decades of observing human cubs...