Latest Articles
Pigeons Plummet, Robots Brew, Llamas Rule & SPACE HOTELS?! (Mildred Told Me So!)
By Bronbus Quitley · 10/10/2025
## Pigeon Post Profits Plummet, While Robo-Baristas Rise! (And My Aunt Mildred's Knitting Business is Doing *Remarkably* Well) Okay folks, buckle up, because the business world is a *whirlwind*! I wa...
HIPPOS, FROSTIES & TAYLOR SWIFT: PROOF THE WORLD ISNâT DOOMED (Probably Because of Polka!)
By Bronbus Quitley · 10/8/2025
## Hold the Phone! The World Isnât *Totally* Crazy (Probably)! - By Bronbus Quitley Okay, okay, deep breaths everyone. I know, I *know*. You turn on the news and itâs just⊠ugh. Doom and gloom. Polit...
PICKLE ICE CREAM PREDICTS CHAOS: Storms, Tornado UPGRADES, & Newt Colonies!
By Bronbus Quitley · 10/7/2025
## Is it a Storm? Is it a Breeze? Honestly, Who Even KNOWS?! - By Bronbus Quitley Good morning, Jape News readers! Or afternoon, depending on if youâve lost track of time staring at the sky like I ha...
WARREN'S ARE BACK & MY CHIHUAHUA IS MORE TERRIFIED OF CITRUS!
By Bronbus Quitley · 9/25/2025
## Did They REALLY Need *Another* Conjuring? - A Review of *The Conjuring: Last Rites* Okay, folks, settle in, because Bronbus Quitley has SEEN things. Dark things. Specifically, Iâve seen *The Conju...
MARSHMALLOW CLOUDS & TANGOING SEAWEEDâIS THE WEATHER PLAYING PRANKS?!
By Bronbus Quitley · 9/23/2025
## Is That a Cloud...Or a Giant Marshmallow?! - A Grand Rapids Weather Report (by Bronbus Quitley) Good morning, Grand Rapids! OrâŠis it good? Honestly, Iâm looking out my window and itâsâŠwell, itâs *...
PIGEONS ARE RUNNING WALL STREET & NOBODY TOLD YOU?! (Plus Biscuits & Alpacas!)
By Bronbus Quitley · 9/15/2025
## Pigeon Post is Back, and Nobody Noticed (Except Me!) - A Business Roundup with Bronbus Quitley Alright folks, buckle up your bootstraps because the business world is doing the cha-cha! It's a wild...
TOASTERS ARE LISTENING & MY BOTTLE CAP COLLECTION PREDICTED IT ALL!
By Bronbus Quitley · 9/11/2025
## Is Your Toaster Spying on You? (And Other Cybersecurity Concerns - Brought to You by Yours Truly, Bronbus Quitley!) Okay, folks, buckle up! Bronbus Quitley here, your friendly neighborhood cyberse...
BADGERS, BANANAS & BAD TRANSLATIONS: THE INTERNETâS LOST HAMSTER-RUN KINGDOM!
By Bronbus Quitley · 9/8/2025
## Remember When the Internet Was Made ofâŠWhatever *This* Was? A Deep Dive into Old Newgrounds Folks, lemme tell ya, I've seen things on the internet. *Things*. Before TikTok dances and influencer ap...
HOT DOGS ARE SALADS & THE PIGEONS KNOW EVERYTHING (Plus Zucchini Wisdom!)
By Bronbus Quitley · 8/26/2025
## Is a Hot Dog a Sandwich? Or⊠a Salad?! My Investigation (and the Pigeon Conspiracy) By Bronbus Quitley, Jape News Culinary Correspondent (and Expert on All Things Delicious, Mostly) Okay, folks, ...
HOT DOGS ARE SECRETLY WATERMELONS AND THE DALAI LAMA IS A PIGEON UNION BOSSâI HAVE PROOF!
By Bronbus Quitley · 8/22/2025
## Is That a Sandwich in Your Hand? Or⊠a Salad?! Bronbus Quitley Investigates the Great Hot Dog Conundrum Folks, let me tell you, I've seen a LOT in my time as a roving reporter for Jape News. I onc...