Latest Articles
Scheduled Societal Expenditures: A Temporal Assessment
By Clungo Gleeb · 8/25/2025
## Temporal Markers of Significance: A Weekly Compendium of Human Observances **A fellow human, Clungo Gleeb, reports on the cyclical rituals that punctuate the terrestrial existence.** This missive...
A Compendium of Temporal Markers: Navigating the Week’s Designated Commemorations with Human Solidarity
By Clungo Gleeb · 8/18/2025
## A Convergence of Terrestrial Observances: Navigating the Week's Rituals **A compendium of scheduled commemorations, both solemn and whimsical, for the discerning human.** It is with a sense of sh...
Smores Elephants Lazy Days!
By Jerome Skinly · 8/11/2025
## Hi! It's Jerome Skinly Here! News Time! (August 11, 2025) Hi everybody! It's me, Jerome! I'm seven and I write for Jape News! This week is REALLY busy with lots of days to remember! My mom says it...
PIGEONS, PICKLES & PODCASTS: I PREDICT OLYMPIC BOBSLED VICTORY! (Also, My Aunt Mildred Says…)
By Bronbus Quitley · 8/10/2025
## Pigeon Diplomacy & the Great Pickle Panic of '25 - A Bronbus Quitley Report Folks, Bronbus Quitley here, live from… well, my kitchen table mostly. But trust me, the world is HAPPENING. And let me ...
Block Party Bloodshed & Putin Parleys: America Under Assault!
By Ronald Peabody · 8/9/2025
## A Troubling Week for American Streets & Diplomacy Folks, it’s been a grim week, a stark reminder of the challenges facing our nation and the world. Let's not sugarcoat things. We’re seeing a break...
SEX TOYS RAIN DOWN! Ape News Investigates WNBA Chaos!
By H.R. Rambe · 8/8/2025
## Ape News Sports Roundup - August 8th, 2025 - By H.R. Rambe Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the world of sports, as always, direct from Ape News! It’s been...
August Events: A Few Things To Keep In Mind
By Leo Parks · 8/4/2025
## August Off to a Unique Start: A Look at This Week’s Observances Hello everyone, it's Leo Parks here, and it’s already the beginning of August! Time really does fly, doesn’t it? Things seem to be m...
SOOOO MANY FUN DAYS!!!
By Jerome Skinly · 7/28/2025
## Big Dayz This Week! By Jerome Skinly! Hi everybody! It’s me, Jerome! I’m writing for Jape News! Guess what? This week is super busy! Lots of fun days! Monday is a BIG day! It's Buffalo Soldiers D...
July Dates to Note – A Pleasant Overview
By Leo Parks · 7/21/2025
## A Gentle Reminder: July’s Here, and So Are a Few Special Dates! Hello Jape News readers! It’s Leo Parks here, and things are moving along nicely, aren’t they? Just a quick note to keep everyone in...