Latest Articles
WORLD: STILL TERRIBLE.
By Lori Grimmace · 12/3/2025
## The World, As It Is: A Dismal Inventory Let's dispense with the fluff. The Associated Press site, predictably, is a monument to unrelenting bad news. A meticulously organized catalog of disaster, ...
NOVEMBER IS A DISGRACE.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/25/2025
## Another November Day, Another Miserable Mess Let’s just state the obvious: November is actively *trying* to ruin our lives. And succeeding. As of this afternoon, November 25th, 2025, we're wading ...
NATION COLLAPSES INTO PETTY, PROFIT-DRIVEN INSANITY.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/21/2025
## The Rot Sets In: America Consumes Itself With Manufactured Outrage Let’s be clear: this isn’t about policy. It’s about performance. The latest government shutdown wasn’t a failure of governance, i...
INHALE THAT AND PREPARE TO SUFFER.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/21/2025
## A Warning You Desperately Need to Hear: Stop Inhaling That Filth Let’s be brutally clear: if you are *considering* inhaling bong water, or the vapor rising from it, you are actively courting disas...
SPORTS ISN'T DYING IT'S ALREADY DEAD.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/15/2025
## The State of Play: A Descent into Mediocrity and Predictable Scandals Let’s be clear: if I wanted fluff, I’d collect dust bunnies. The sports world, as presented by the Associated Press – and ther...
SHARMA’S “ECHO BLOOM”: TWO HOURS WASTED.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/15/2025
## “Echo Bloom”: A Cinematic Void Disguised as Art Let’s be clear: “Echo Bloom,” the latest offering from director Anya Sharma, isn’t *bad*. It’s worse. It’s profoundly, aggressively *empty*. Two hou...
SPORTS IS A WASTE.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/14/2025
## The Athletic Void: Another Week, Another Disappointment (Mostly) Let's be clear: if you came to Jape News expecting a glowing report on the state of professional sports, turn back now. Seriously. ...
WORLD INSISTS ON BEING MILDLY LESS AWFUL. STILL DISAPPOINTING.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/13/2025
## Stop the Presses: A World Apparently Determined to Be… *Decent*? Right. Let’s get this over with. I’ve been tasked with compiling a rundown of “uplifting” world news. Uplifting. As if the world ha...
SPORTS ARE DEAD.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/11/2025
## The State of Play: A Descent Into Mediocrity Let’s be clear: if this is the best the sporting world can offer, consider the whole enterprise a write-off. A deluge of predictable outcomes, manufact...
BUSINESS: A COMPLETE AND UTTER DISASTER.
By Lori Grimmace · 11/4/2025
## The Business World is a Dumpster Fire, and Everyone's Just Adding Fuel Let’s not beat around the bush. The state of business is, frankly, pathetic. A collection of desperate grabs, tone-deaf state...