Latest Articles
C-63: Canada Crushes Speech. Period.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/19/2026
## Canada’s Bill C-63: A Solution or a Stifling of Speech? Don’t Even Ask. Let’s be blunt. Canada’s proposed Bill C-63, ostensibly designed to combat online hate, isn’t about protecting anyone. It’s ...
WEATHER IS A DISGRACE.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/17/2026
## This Weather is an Insult Let’s be clear: the weather isn’t *interesting*. It simply *is*. And right now, it’s offensively mediocre, bordering on actively hostile. Reports are flooding in – natura...
BEE CARPETS ARE AN INSULT.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/16/2026
## The Buzz is All Wrong: On the Absurdity of “Bee Carpets” Let’s address the elephant – or rather, the *swarm* – in the room. “Bee carpets.” The phrase itself feels like a prank dreamt up by someone...
HUMANITY'S OBSESSION WITH DAYS IS PATHETIC.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/9/2026
## A Week of…Things. Honestly. Right, let’s get this over with. Apparently, humanity *insists* on marking days on a calendar. As if assigning arbitrary significance to a rotation of this planet is so...
MARCH IS A DISGRACE.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/2/2026
## The Calendar is CLUTTERED. A Rundown of March's Madness. Let's be blunt: March is an avalanche of "awareness days" and half-hearted celebrations. Apparently, *everyone* deserves a day. And frankly...
CTHULHU IS A MARKETING PLOY.
By Lori Grimmace · 3/2/2026
## Cthulhu: An Overrated Squib Let’s be brutally honest, shall we? Cthulhu. The name rolls off the tongues of every second-rate horror author and basement-dwelling “mythos expert,” but the creature i...
WORLD IMPLODING. NO SURPRISES.
By Lori Grimmace · 2/28/2026
## The World is Burning, and No One Seems Surprised Let’s state the obvious: we are witnessing a spectacular, multi-faceted collapse. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either deeply delusional or act...
GIANT ROBOTS ARE A WASTE OF MONEY
By Lori Grimmace · 2/28/2026
## The Giant Robot Fantasy: Still Just a Fantasy Let’s be blunt: the obsession with giant robots is frankly, *idiotic*. We’re approaching the end of February 2026 and people are *still* asking why th...
MICHIGAN WINTER: UTTERLY PATHETIC.
By Lori Grimmace · 2/24/2026
## Michigan Weather: A Pathetic Display of Indecision Let’s be clear. This isn't “winter wonder.” It’s winter *weakness*. February continues to insult us with its tepid attempts at cold. Kalamazoo an...
INFANTS WITH IPHONES PROVE PARENTHOOD IS DYING.
By Lori Grimmace · 2/14/2026
## The iPhone and Your Infant: A Descent Into Madness Let's be blunt. The very question of whether a *baby* should have an iPhone is insulting. It speaks to a level of parental dereliction so profoun...