Latest Articles
FUNERALS GONE WILD: Decency Dies With The Departed!
By Ronald Peabody · 2/27/2026
## A Final Laugh: Top Ten Things People Actually Said At Funerals Folks, let’s be honest. Funerals are *supposed* to be somber. A time for reflection, for mourning the loss of a loved one, and for re...
MY ROCK IS STILL COOL!
By Jerome Skinly · 2/26/2026
## Why Did the News Stop Talking About My Rock? Hi! I’m Jerome Skinly and I’m seven. I have a really cool rock. It’s gray and kinda sparkly. Last week, *everyone* was talking about my rock! I showed...
Bwirdie Bums: No Tooties?! Owo's Dewp Dive Into Feathwed Fwattin' ~UwU~
By Owo Lengston · 2/24/2026
## Owo, Do Birdies Toot? A Deep Dive Into Birdie Bottoms! ~UwU~ Hewwo Jape News weadews! It’s yer boy, Owo Lengston, hewe to twackle a vewy impowtant question today: Do bwirdies fawt?! I mean, imagin...
FUNERAL FOLLIES! Ape News Unearths Tombstone Ticklers!
By H.R. Rambe · 2/21/2026
## Top Ten Tombstone Ticklers: Ape News Reports on Funeral Faux Pas **By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Correspondent** Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the world of…w...
HOT DOGS ARE NOT SANDWICHES! THEY ARE TACOS! (Maybe)
By Jerome Skinly · 2/20/2026
## Hot Dogs: Sandwich OR Salad?! (By Jerome Skinly, Age 7) Hi! I’m Jerome and I’m a reporter for Jape News. Today I’m trying to figure out something REALLY important. Are hot dogs sandwiches? Or… sal...
INTERNET NONSENSE: Is This What Our Children Are Looking At?
By Ronald Peabody · 2/18/2026
## The Degradation of Digital Discourse: A Look Back at… Whatever *This* Is Folks, I’ve been asked to write about “old Newgrounds memes.” Now, I’ll admit, I’m not entirely sure what a “meme” *is* in ...
SKY IS PUFFY AND LOST!
By Jerome Skinly · 2/17/2026
## The Sky is… Doing Stuff! - By Jerome Skinly Hi! I’m Jerome and I write for Jape News! Today I was gonna tell you about the weather, but… it's kinda tricky. See, I asked the computer to TELL me the...
Cwowz Awe Thicc, Smawt, and Wiww Remembew Yo' Face, UwU! 👀
By Owo Lengston · 2/15/2026
## Owo, Da Crows Awe So Cwute and Smart! 🥺 Hewwo evewyone, it’s ya boi Owo Lengston, and today we’we talkin’ ‘bout cwows! Yes, dose big, bwack biwdies dat awe *so* mysterious and kinda spooky, but a...
HUMANS MODIFY METAL: APE NEWS REPORTS VEHICULAR CHAOS!
By H.R. Rambe · 2/15/2026
## Wheelie Weird: A Look at Automotive Absurdity - By H.R. Rambe, Ape News Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from the world of…well, frankly, vehicular madness. Her...
MR GRUMBLES IS MAD AT THE BUNNY!
By Jerome Skinly · 2/12/2026
## Mr. Grumbles and the Never-Ending News Hi! I'm Jerome Skinly and I write for Jape News! Today I'm telling you about my neighbor, Mr. Grumbles. He's REALLY old. Not like, super-duper old, but older...