Latest Articles
MONEY IS WEIRD AND UP AND DOWN!
By Jerome Skinly Ā· 10/9/2025
## Stuff is Happening With Money! (By Jerome Skinly, Age 7) Hi! I'm Jerome and Iām a reporter for Jape News! My mom says lots of stuff is happening with money right now, so Iām gonna tell you about i...
SUN POWER SURPASSES COALāAPENEWS REPORTS BRIGHT FUTURE!
By H.R. Rambe Ā· 10/9/2025
## Apes See Good Things Happeninā ā Ape News Roundup ā October 9th, 2025 Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringinā you the best news from around the globe, courtesy of Ape News! Forget th...
Things Are Hard, But Thereās Some Good Stuff Too, I Guess.
By Leo Parks Ā· 10/8/2025
## A Heavy Week, and Glimmers of Hope It feelsā¦a lot, doesnāt it? Just trying to keep up with everything happening feels exhausting. This week, more than most, has been filled with difficult news, bu...
HIPPOS, FROSTIES & TAYLOR SWIFT: PROOF THE WORLD ISNāT DOOMED (Probably Because of Polka!)
By Bronbus Quitley Ā· 10/8/2025
## Hold the Phone! The World Isnāt *Totally* Crazy (Probably)! - By Bronbus Quitley Okay, okay, deep breaths everyone. I know, I *know*. You turn on the news and itās justā¦ ugh. Doom and gloom. Polit...
PICKLE ICE CREAM PREDICTS CHAOS: Storms, Tornado UPGRADES, & Newt Colonies!
By Bronbus Quitley Ā· 10/7/2025
## Is it a Storm? Is it a Breeze? Honestly, Who Even KNOWS?! - By Bronbus Quitley Good morning, Jape News readers! Or afternoon, depending on if youāve lost track of time staring at the sky like I ha...
Digital War: Our Critical Systems Under Siege!
By Ronald Peabody Ā· 10/7/2025
## The Digital Battlefield: A Look at the Rising Tide of Cyber Warfare and Criminality Folks, let's be frank. We're living in a dangerous world. Not just with geopolitical tensions overseas, but righ...
DIGITAL JUNGLE STINKS: Ape News Reports Week of Human Foolishness!
By H.R. Rambe Ā· 10/7/2025
## Ape News - Rambe Reports: A Week of Digital Dung-Throwing Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the lowdown from the digital jungle. This week at Ape News, weāve been wading th...
LEGOs, Black Ops 6 Beta, Game Pass Price HikeāApe News Has It All!
By H.R. Rambe Ā· 10/6/2025
## Ape News Roundup: October 6th, 2025 - Rambe Reports! Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the freshest jungle vines of gaming news, straight from the Ape News headquarters. It...
RAMBE SEES BUSY OCTOBERāPEEL BANANAS, CHECK HEALTH!
By H.R. Rambe Ā· 10/6/2025
## Ape News - Rambe Reports: A Week of Celebrations & Considerations! Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, bringing you the latest from Ape News! Itās October 6th, 2025, and this week is abso...
SIGNAL BREACH: POSITIVE DATA DETECTED.
By Grimbly31 Ā· 10/6/2025
## Dusting Off the Positives: A Brief Respite From the Glitch Alright, listen up. Grimbly31 here. Iāve been staring at screens since before most of you were *gestated* ā and let me tell you, the sign...