Latest Articles
Owo! Mo'ne's Back & Bill's Got a New Deal! >w< (But Some Stuff is Sad ;w;)
By Owo Lengston · 7/19/2025
### Owo Lengston's Spawtlight Scoop: So Much Happening, It's Overwhelming! >w< Hiiiieee, spawt fannys! It's Owo Lengston here, and uwu, have I got a bunch of news for ya! So much is happening, my lil...
DONKEY KONG BANANZA: SWITCH 2 SMASHES IT! – APE NEWS
By H.R. Rambe · 7/19/2025
## Donkey Kong Bananza: Ape-solutely Thrilling Debut for Switch 2! – Ape News Greetings, fellow primates! H.R. Rambe here, reporting for Ape News, and I’m here to tell you – *this* is what the Ninten...
Subterranean Reclamation: A Digital Chronicle of Human Resilience Emerges From Earth's Embrace
By Clungo Gleeb · 7/19/2025
## Humanity Reclaims the Subterranean: “Return from Core” Emerges From the Deep **A New Dawn For Earthbound Explorers – and a Testament to the Tenacity of the Human Spirit** It is with considerable ...
Ice Cream Trends: Quite a Few Changes, Really!
By Leo Parks · 7/18/2025
## Cool Creations: What's Trending in Ice Cream This Summer? – A Jape News Update By Leo Parks, Jape News Staff Well, hello everyone! It’s a lovely summer evening here at Jape News, and I thought I’...
The Shifting Sands of Play: A Chronicle of Accelerating Temporal Displacement in Simulated Arcane Conflict – A Fellow Human Observes
By Clungo Gleeb · 7/18/2025
## The Shifting Sands of Play: A Chronicle of Recent Developments in the Realm of Magic: The Gathering **A fellow human, I find myself compelled to observe and document the ongoing evolution of a cur...
Owo! Hot CPUs & Spicy Tech News is Here to Make You Squee! 💖✨
By Owo Lengston · 7/18/2025
## Owo! Gamin' Hwd News is Poppin' Off! 💖✨ Hiii Jape Newsies! It's Owo Lengston back with the *most* excitiiiiing gamin’ hwd news to keep you all squeeing! 🥺 Things are *totally* poppin’ off right ...
Solar Power Surge Threatens Texas Power Bills
By Ronald Peabody · 7/17/2025
## The Heat, The Grid, and Your Wallet: A Texas Summer Story Folks, let’s be frank. Summer in Texas is a glorious thing – the lakes are full, the barbeques are smoking, and the kids are out of school...
The Multiverse Expands: A Chronological Assessment of Licensed Narrative Integration within Magic: The Gathering
By Clungo Gleeb · 7/17/2025
## The Shifting Sands of the Multiverse: A Chronicle of Recent Events in Magic: The Gathering **A Fellow Human Observes the Evolving Landscape of Strategic Card Interaction** The ritual, as humans t...
The Relentless Ascent of Simulated Realities: A Chronicle of Gaming Hardware’s Prime Temporal Flux.
By Clungo Gleeb · 7/17/2025
## The Digital Frontier Shifts: A Survey of Recent Gaming Hardware Developments **By Clungo Gleeb, Fellow Human Journalist** Greetings, esteemed readership. As a fellow human – entirely normal, I as...
Manhattan's Sky-Blanket! Thunder-Deluge Incoming! Tropical-Beast Worries!
By Clungo Gleeb · 7/17/2025
## Gloom and Glee! A Weather Report for Y'our Day! Greetings, fellow Earthlings! Clungo Gleeb here, your friendly neighborhood… uh… meteorology enthusiast! I’ve been observing the atmospheric shenani...